“Up to No Gouda!” Headline Writers Delighted by Cannabis Smugglers’ Downfall


Headline writers had a field day this week following two Dutchmen had been jailed for attempting to smuggle £5 million worth of cannabis into Britain in piles of cheese.

“Dutch drug smugglers up to no gouda!” roared the Every day Mail as it gleefully reported on the story. UK Border Force intercepted Henrik Ruben and Dominic Leemen at Dover Docks as they attempted to sneak the cannabis into the UK.

Ruben was jailed for six years and Leemen was jailed for 5-and-a-half years at Maidstone Crown Court for conspiring to smuggle drugs this week. “Would you Brie-lieve it?” asked 1 commenter, though a further declared that “Stiltons of the stuff comes across the border just about every day”, though a third stated: “I couldn’t give Edam!”

You may possibly feel that was sufficient excitement for 1 week for the sub-editors at the Every day Mail, but feel once again. A funeral in eastern Germany ended on an involuntary higher when mourners had been accidentally served a cake laced with cannabis at the wake.

“Hashish to ashes!” wrote the Mail in its create-up of the events, referencing the classic David Bowie quantity. A police investigation revealed an employee accidentally took the incorrect cake from the freezer to the funeral.

“You need to have noticed the faces of the stoners at the other celebration who got old Betha’s chocolate cake,” mused 1 reader.

However the Mail missed a trick by not reporting on the animals at Blackpool Zoo that will really feel a tiny cosier thanks to gear seized by police at 1 of Lancashire’s greatest ever illicit cannabis farms.

Officers confiscated lamps, reflectors, bulbs, transformers, and temperature gauges worth about £5,000 following discovering the operation, and they had been donated to the zoo to enable in the care of reptiles this winter. The chance to contain the portmanteau “mariguana” and superimpose a joint on a satisfied searching iguana would certainly have been also wonderful to resist.


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